There are no times like the times
you can say remember the old times.
You know it is a lot of fun when most
of the conversation begins with, “Do you remember when…”
This last week was a GREAT week. It started on Sunday afternoon when a dear
couple with whom we have been friends for over 30 years came for a visit. About
midnight, though the stories were far from exhausted, we had to call it a
night. The next morning, we started all
over again. Finally, about noon we had
to let them go; they had other vacation plans and we had to get ready for an
important trip.
On Tuesday, I had a client
meeting with one of my churches. This
church has a new preacher and as we discussed our strategic plan for our
campaign I was impressed by the hopefulness as we talked. Long before the campaign begins there will be
a strong emphasis on developing some deep and abiding relationships. I was thrilled as the new pastor talked about
getting to know people and making friends.
True, this was the pastor’s 2nd day on the job and there is a
long way to go. But in this circumstance
this is a hope-filled beginning.
Wednesday, I spent talking to
prospects for my consulting firm. One of
these prospects is a church that meets in the building where I used to
minister. I toured their building, which
was built while I was there, and saw that many of the dreams and visions I had
for ministry have been fulfilled in their ministry. Memories flooded over me with every step I
took. This was a profoundly joyful and
humbling moment.
Thursday was about performing a
wedding for a dear friend of many years.
When first we met, she had a nine-month-old baby on her hip and a little
girl riding a tricycle around our feet.
That baby is now a high school senior and looks like a lineman for the
NFL and the kid on the tricycle is a beautiful college girl. This wedding allowed us to reconnect with
other friends from that time and again we sat around and told stories and
laughed at those long ago moments.
Friday was a bloody mess. We were with our daughter and son-in-law. He
is a fine country boy and it was butchering day for the chickens. He and I took 10 chickens from the pen to the
freezer and while that will not be the high point of the week, it certainly was
a memory moment. Saturday was my granddaughter’s
first birthday party. She will not
remember that party at all, but it was an occasion that people related by
birth, marriage, and faith came together to build memories.
Sunday we worshiped with our
daughter and grandkids and her preacher, another old acquaintance, shared with
me the vision of his ministry. The
speaker of the day was one of a number of younger men he is mentoring to send
out to plant churches. He meets with
them for teaching, accountability, coaching and the growing of relationships.
As we drove home on Monday, I
asked my wife to get out my yellow legal pad and we began writing down the
specific lessons we learned from our friend’s visit the previous Sunday. In a matter of moments, we have a legal pad full
of notes on what they taught us, confirmed in us, or with which they challenged
us. I will forgo sharing these lessons;
they are a bit personal. But one common
thread ran through every moment of this fantastic week.
It was nothing other than the incredible
value of relationships. I needed that
lesson. My personality is one that wants
to build empires, projects, campaigns, or programs. I want a checklist of things to do and then
delight in making the check marks. I can
be very agenda driven. But as I had
conversations with people who have meant so much to me over the last 30 years
we never mentioned projects. We told
stories of the events that shaped our friendships and made memories.
Today, I have a lot of things on
my checklist; I was gone for a week. But
in the midst of my strategic planning for the next 6 months I want to take time
to do something and build a memory with someone. Thirty years from now it is possible that the
gathering will not be a wedding, but a funeral-mine. What I hope happens after the service is that
people will sit around and eat a potluck dinner and someone will say, “Hey, do
you remember when Charlie…?” To have
that moment then, I have to build the relationship now.
So, today, go do something that
will build or begin to build that relationship.
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