The delaying action on the moral battlefield

As Christians living in a post-Christian, formerly Christian and rapidly becoming hostile to Christian society, we face a unique challenge.  In the first centuries of the church, Christians faced an indifferent and then hostile Roman government.  In our society, we live and work in a context where the culture had a nominally Christian worldview and was positively disposed toward the church, if not actively supportive of Christian ministries. 

That has changed.  We now live and work in a culture that is radically pluralistic in its worldview, and hostile to any exclusive truth claims, except those of radical pluralism.  In this context, what is the best approach for Christians to take?  Many Christians, myself included, believe that fighting a culture war on the terms of those who espouse a pluralistic world is a lost cause.  No one is suggesting that Christians should turn a blind eye to the moral breakdown that is happening around us.  The question is how do we best address that breakdown.

Since the late 70’s, the socially conservative right, generally associated with conservative Christians and the political right, has tried to influence the direction of our society by working within the political/judicial systems.  We have witnessed the rise of the Moral Majority and the Christian Coalition and a number of other PACs and ‘ministries’.  They have enjoyed some minor success and short-lived victories.  However, the moral decay of the culture is unabated.  The Messe Commission, with such conservatives as James Dobson, advised putting the full force of the federal government into the effort of stamping out pornography.  How is that working?

The track record of long term moral reform using the political/judicial approach is about as good as the Atlanta Falcons in the Super Bowl, mostly spectators and when they get involved, they don’t do very well.  This is not meant as a condemnation of those people who have work so faithfully in these areas.  But the efforts for moral reform through the political/judicial system are not unlike a delaying action on a battlefield.  A battle is never won by a delaying action, it may, however, allow for the real offensive to begin.  Unfortunately, many Christians have mistaken the delaying action on the political/judicial front as the real offensive.

There is a better way!

Let’s suppose there are, as of May 2016, 10 million committed disciples of Jesus Christ in this country of about 320 million.  (I hope there are more but I have my doubts)  If each of those 10 million disciples were to lead one person to faith in Jesus Christ and lead them to do the same, in one year there would be 20 million committed disciples of Jesus Christ.  That means that in May 2017, those 20 million would begin repeating the process.  So, by May 2018, there would be 40 million and in May 2019, there would be 80 million.  By the time of the next presidential election, there would be over 160 million committed followers of Jesus Christ.  And a year into the next President’s second term nearly everyone in this nation would be a disciple of Christ.  We are 5 years away from a nation in which laws on the books are less important than the law as summarized by Jesus.  There is no way that working in the political/judicial system can accomplish so much, so fast.  The best hope for a five-year plan in the political/judicial approach would be to delay the rate of decay, but would never reverse that decay.

Realistically, I don’t believe this will happen for three reasons. 

First, many Christians are too busy being distracted from the work of making disciples by the craftiness of the enemy.  By believing our own delaying action is the real fight, we have put ourselves in the position to distracted to love, reach, evangelize and disciple our neighbors.  The limited resources are sent to support the losing side in a delaying action while the real battle is left un-fought. 

Second, many people want the benefits of a Christian ethic without the commitment to Christ.  Too many of us want the blessings of a “Traditional, American Christian Culture”; we just don’t want the cross.   Jesus said that to be His disciple we have to die to self.  Many only want to rid our society of other’s sins.  We rail against the sins that offend us, such as transgender behavior, gay marriage, or legalization of marijuana while not addressing the sin in our own lives.  We want a society that on the surface looks very much like “Leave it to Beaver”, but in which we can still watch porn on line, practice covert racism, or practice lives of greedy luxury while people go hungry.

Third, many “Christians” simply do not love lost people.  They may love the folks they like-folks who are like them and don’t offend them or make them uncomfortable, who happen to be lost- but they do not love people who are lost and fit into certain categories.   I heard a man teaching a Sunday School class say, “I want no queers in my church”.  There is so much wrong with that statement I hardly know where to begin.  I suppose the shortest answer is, “Die on a cross, be buried, return to life, start your own church then you can keep them out of your church!”  Could we read into the attitude of many Christians as to say, “I would rather them go to Hell?”  Perhaps, we could love and accept messed up people if they get fixed, straightened out, and cleaned up.  But that will never happen because they are incapable of change until God’s grace works on them.  That grace, by God’s design, flows through us to the messed up people. 

One aspect of the political/judicial approach that is very appealing to many Christians is that it doesn’t require me to love or in anyway get involved with people trapped in sin.  One need never get any closer to them than across a police barricade while we hold our signs and chant slogans at each other.  Meanwhile……the enemy laughs.  

The Magic of Transgender Bathrooms

Several years ago, I spoke with an elderly lady who, as a youth, assisted her father in his magic act.  Her father had just passed away and she was talking about all of the tricks he had personally developed.  He guarded the secret to those tricks so jealously that even as the assistant she was only told what she had to know.  She told me that her dad was an incredible magician and showman.  I asked her what was it that made his shows so incredible.  Beyond his passion for keeping the trick a secret was his ability to get the audience to look where he wanted them to look. 

“If the trick was being performed by the right hand, he would have you looking somewhere else.  But every magician tries to do that.  What daddy could do was to get the person who knew the trick was in the right hand to look away for a moment.  People would be watching the off hand expecting to catch something and then, at the critical moment, he would do something with his head or foot or shoulder or with a prop.  The person would glance there just long enough to miss what happened.  They would see something, a flinch or a movement and think, ‘I’ve got him,’ but daddy would be getting them.  Sometimes he would have 2 or 3 diversions in quick succession, all of it just to get the audience to not see what was really happening.”

I believe that is the magic of transgender bathrooms.  Have you noticed a flurry of activity around the issues of human sexuality during the last few years?  These are not new issues, but suddenly we are being bombarded with news about gay marriage, those who will not participate in gay marriages, Minor Attraction aka pedophilia, or celebrities that have had sex change operations.  At the moment, it seems that all news broadcasts have to have an item about trans-gender bathrooms or the lack of it.  A transgender teen in a small community in a small western town made national news because he/she is running for the school board.  This student feels that the school system has not provided adequate bathrooms.  Who knows what is next on the human sexuality battlefront.  One possibility is the issue of poly-amorous attraction, which is just a new term for polygamy or open marriage.  I can almost hear the question now, “Why is there ONLY space for two names on a marriage license?  That is a discrimination against those in love with several people.  We demand blah, blah, blah…”

These issues are nothing more than distractions for the church.  Don’t get me wrong; I take a very traditional view of marriage and human sexuality, one man and one woman for one lifetime.  I also understand the role of the church as the conscience of society.  I believe that one of the roles of law is to teach moral codes and, therefore, our civil laws are important.  I signed and asked others to sign the Manhattan Declaration.  My credentials as a social conservative are impeccable.  But having read the Bible several times, I never recall the church being told to “Defend Marriage, fight for Traditional Values, teach Democratic or Republican Ethics, reverse global warming or fight against the inflationary cost of goats milk in the Himalayans.”  In my careful reading of scripture, I find that we are called both collectively and individually to love God and People (all people) and go and make disciples. 

If the arch deceiver can get the church distracted from the calling of making disciples by putting on a show about human sexuality, or anything else for that matter, he is well pleased and satisfied with the magic of gay marriage.  So, the next time you find yourself getting stirred up because you read news articles or tweets, see a Facebook post, or hear of another story about human sexuality issues, pause and check to see if the dark illusionist isn’t trying to distract you from your calling to make disciples.  

Generations at war at church

As a church or ministry leader you are very likely working with at least four generations at any given time.  Sometimes it is difficult to get consensus on how to do the work of ministry.  It shouldn’t be hard, should it?  We are all Christians; we all want to see the Kingdom come, and the Lord’s will done, don’t we?  But sometimes it seems that there is no common ground between the generations.  Members of one generation act as if the members of the other generation are actually opposing the work of ministry.  In some cases there arises negative feelings that range from quiet discomfort to open hostility.  

Generational studies are fascinating and by no means a new subject.  Every generation has in some way rebelled against the generation(s) that it follows.  But in your church or ministry you now have four generations and before long five generations volunteering and working, if not together near each other.  How is it possible that people saved by the same Christ, working in the same tradition, fellowship or denomination, and with, we assume, a shared set of beliefs and values can see things the same way?  The reason why is they do not share the same view of the world.

Thousands of words have been posted and many volumes have been printed and will continue to be posted and printed on the subject about the change and friction from generation to generation.  As a leader it is a subject you can’t ignore.  For this brief moment I want to look at one area that demonstrates the way the generations see the same subject radically different, and you are looking at it right now!  Generalizations always fail at some point, but they are a useful tool. 

How the generations view IT.

Millennial Generation (born circa 1981 - 2000) IT is home.

When a millennial was born they emerged from the mother’s womb so adapt at information technology they were cordless.  Approximately 1/3 of these children were using a computer before the age of 5.  They are unique in that for the first time in history a generation knew more than their parents about a subject that actually mattered.  In every generation the young have had more knowledge than their parents, on given subjects but it was generally trivial matters.  (Boomers knew more about English rock bands than their parents, but neither generation cared).  From how to program the DVR to how to install a new app on a smart phone, the millennial knows how.  For a millennial IT is an appliance, like the fridge or microwave, it is always there, always been used and always accessible.  IT is an all-encompassing reality.  It is how they get and listen to music and watch videos.  It is how they connect with friends, how they bank and how they share and have their opinions shaped.  They were the first generation for which IT is their mother tongue. 

Generation X (born circa 1960-1980) IT is the cool new toy.

The early Gen Xers stood in awe looking at a four function calculator the size of a small cigar box that sold for a mere $90.  The first half of Gen Xers heard rumors of computers being in their school and were jealous of their friends who could afford a TRS 80 or Commodore 64.  Most Gen Xers did not have access to any IT in their early years, but the later half come close to being native speakers of IT.  When the internet skyrocketed, they were, if not in the pilot seat, along for the ride.  They got great jobs before the dot.com bubble burst and can crave the latest and greatest versions of everything.  They took to IT like a kid on Christmas morning playing with a new toy.

Baby Boomers (circa 1943 – 1960) IT is a new tool to be mastered.

The birth rate increase did not occur till 9 months after VJ day, but in many ways those born at the end of WW 2 are culturally Boomers.  They are well educated, competitive and success driven.  From Star Trek to Lost in Space, Boomers grew up with the idea of computers; they were never around.  Boomers saw the flashing lights in the background at the NASA control center, but for most that is as close as they came to IT until the PC revolution.  They embraced IT not so much out of excitement like GenX or as a fact of life like the millennial, but as a new tool to help them succeed.  Boomers still have a love-hate relationship with IT.  With each new upgrade they cringe a little, worrying how much they will have to relearn.  But they delight in Facebook stalking their children and Skyping with distant grand children. They have concluded that IT is a pretty useful tool. 

Traditional aka Builder Generation (Before  circa 1943)  IT is a distraction. 

The Traditional Generation doesn’t understand what all the fuss is about regarding IT.  They are the ultimate pragmatist and have adapted IT as it is useful.  Those still in the work place use IT, but often think of it as a high performance typewriter.  They, like their Boomer children, enjoy the connectedness that the internet provides, but they are more likely to use their smart phone to make a phone call than stream videos.  They are much less obsessed with real time answers and connections than younger generations and can recall when a letter took days to cross the country and are fine with that pace.  This generation is noted for its loyalty to and trust in institutions.   After all a government that ended a depression, won a three theater World War, rebuilt Europe and created economic prosperity shaped them.  They like structure and order, and IT seems too decentralized, too unstructured and too unpredictable.  They were taught by teachers and books the way it is supposed to be.  So, if your millennial child is on the couch Googling The New Deal with their traditional grand parent talking to them, the traditional grand parent will find IT a terrible distraction. 

Now, if these four generations see something like IT so radically different, imagine the potential, various understandings of what it means to worship, pray, or serve.  

10 Things We Can Do about Clergy Killers!

Many preachers receive little support from their fellowship, or denominational offices when it comes to dealing with Clergy Killers in their congregations.    I talked to a number of preachers about their reaction to the ministers of the UCC in Canada becoming part of a union.  Most of the preachers I spoke with were understanding, even if they felt like a union was the wrong solution.  Some preachers from formal denominations feel that their denomination provides the job security, benefits, and wage protection.  However, the presences of denominational protections are not a guarantee against emotional hardship or personal attacks.  Preachers from non-denominational churches or loosely affiliated denominations/fellowships expressed the highest levels of insecurity.

Personally, I come from the perspective of one who has be raised, trained, and has ministered in a non-denominational fellowship made up of autonomous, independent congregations.  The solution for Clergy Killers will vary widely depending on affiliation, but there are a few principles that might be helpful.  These suggestions are by no means exhaustive, but may serve as a beginning point.   

·      Be realistic when asked about a congregation.

The first step is that we must be painfully honest about congregations.  I was once asked to consider a church that was looking for a minister.  I was told, “This is a good opportunity.”  Looking at this church, I found that she had a turn over rate for ministers that was staggering.  Most of the ministers that left resigned under pressure, a few were fired, and all were discouraged.  The leadership of the church was notably harsh in dealing with preachers.  This leadership was committed to keeping control and maintaining their power and authority; as a result, the church had not grown in a very long time.  Yet someone had the naivety to call this “a good opportunity”.   As long as we are dishonest about the condition of clergy killer churches, we will continue to see these churches devastate ministers with impunity.   

·      Reject the myth of the right fit.

We have often excused clergy killing churches by saying, “They haven’t found the ‘right fit’”.  Finding the right fit between minister and congregation is challenging.  But we mustn’t shift the blame of bad behavior away from those behaving badly with a no-fault cliché.  I have known churches that never seem to find the right fit. They have had ministers that were young, old, middle aged, intellectual, dynamic, evangelistic, pastoral and every other possible style of ministry.  There is no right fit for an evil congregation!  Say it with me: There is “no right fit” for an evil congregation!  We must accept that fact that just as there are evil people, there are also evil churches.

·      We must demand that with authority, there is accountability.

Authority without accountability is an absolute formula for disaster.  Whether the polity is that of an independent congregation or a highly structured denomination, where there is authority there must be accountability.  When a congregation begins looking for a minister, there will be those who have the formal or informal authority to guide or assist in that process.   If a person, office, or organization consistently enables dysfunctional churches to hire and then abuse ministers, those persons, offices, or organization needs to be held accountable. 

·      Practice good church discipline. 

The first objective of church discipline is always restorative.  The second role of church discipline is protective; to protect the innocent from the actions of evil people.  That needs to be done with troublesome churches.  Without being mean- spirited or vindictive, churches that are vicious to ministers need to be told, “Until you bear the fruit of repentance regarding the way you have treated past ministers, we will not help you find a new minister.  We will help you address these issues, but until we see evidence of change, we cannot recommend any minister to you.”

·      Offer coaching during transition.   

Churches that have a high turnover rate or have ministers consistently leaving under distress need to perform a guided self-evaluation when a minister leaves.  There are surely enough wise, godly people to spot sick churches and offer them help.  Such a transition check up can help catch and perhaps reverse clergy killer tendencies.  If this is a new pattern, perhaps it can be broken before it becomes part of the church’s culture.  It might be difficult to force unhealthy churches to participate in such a review with their whole heart.  But their refusal to participate can be noted when minister’s inquire about the congregation.

·      Mark land mines.

Long after active hostilities end, war ravaged nations have to deal with unexploded landmines.  Signs warning about the presence of landmines often mark dangerous areas.  Travellers are free to go to these places, but they do so knowing the risk.  Churches that have a record of battering ministers need to be marked as a spiritual mine field because some clergy killer churches will never change.  It is not going to happen ever.  Clergy killers are completely committed to their agenda and power and will not see that power challenged.  Many clergy killers could relate to Milton’s Paradise Lost where Satan says,  “Better to reign in hell than serve in Heaven.” 

·      “Put us out of our misery.”

Some clergy killer churches are angry, bitter, and mean-spirited because they are dying and don’t have processes to deal with the reality.  There are occasions when the best thing to do is help a church that is dead or dying close, rather than have it continue to exist as a Zombie church (not dead and not living) that keeps killing preachers.  All living things have a life cycle: birth, growth, maturity, reproduction, decline, and death.  The church is no different.  When a church has passed from decline to death but keeps operations, it can easily become a clergy killer.  In such cases, churches need loving, gentle, congregational, hospice care. 

·      Address this issue in Bible college/seminary.

The training that Bible College and seminary students receive concerning conflicts within the church is woefully inadequate.  When it comes to the presence of actively evil people in leadership undermining ministry, I have yet to hear of the subject being addressed.  I corresponded with the head of the ministry department at one large Bible College asking him to address these issues.  He responded that they didn’t want to discourage young ministers by being too negative.  That is the equivalent of refusing to tell a soldier in infantry training that he might be shot at because he might find it discouraging!  Every Bible College and seminary ought to have a module or focused study on the reality of clergy killers and how to address them.  Until that happens, ministry training is incomplete.

·      Emphasize church planting. 

One possible solution to the problem of clergy killer congregation is to divert the energy and manpower away from unhealthy churches and invest it in new church planting.  In my work with congregations, I have found that new church plants are generally less prone to the problems of clergy killers.   Bible colleges and seminaries need to emphasize church planting as part of their ministry training curriculum.  That includes planting churches even out of existing congregations.  Let’s call it what it is, a church split.  For years, I was passionately opposed to the possibility of anything good coming from a church planted out of a split.  Two things changed my mind.  First, was seeing healthy dynamic churches that grew when they left the mother church.  Second, seeing the mother church after the split continue as a stagnant church that abused the preachers.  We must be very judicious about such a venture; hence, the value of careful and thoughtful training on the subject.

·      Speak out in a national or regional forum.

In the same way that colleges have not addressed this issue, national and regional conventions and conferences have been negligently silent.  I have yet to hear of any national or regional convention or conference that has made the subject of clergy killers either a main session subject or a workshop topic.  In my own fellowship, I have written and asked that this be a part of our convention program.  The most frequent response was silence.  I was informed that if a ministry that dealt with this issue were so inclined the convention would gladly rent them space in the display hall.    I fear this profound silence is motivated by attention to revenue rather than ministry.

The same can be said for the treatment of the subject by publishing houses.  While there have been some articles in some journals, by and large, the publishing houses associated with given denominations are painfully silent on the subject.  

I can at times become very pessimistic about the issue of clergy killers in the church.  I have valid reasons to be so.  But I remain positive because I believe out of the chaos often comes our greatest opportunity.

When it comes to clergy killers what can be done?

About 25 years ago, I jokingly told a minister friend that we ought to form a union.  I got the idea for an old Bloom County cartoon in which the elves in Santa’s North Pole workshop unionized.  We were both at churches that had some very difficult members and we tried to find relief in some humor. 

Recently, the ministers of the United Church of Christ in Canada have responded to a hostile working environment produced by clergy killers by becoming part of a union.  What was once a joke is now a reality, but forming a union for ministers seems to be the wrong approach to dealing with clergy killers.  So what can be done?

The issue of clergy killers reaches across denominational lines, but there are some general principles that will be useful; specifically, when it comes to what we can do as individual ministers.    

1.     Let’s be honest about the scope and depth of the problem.

For a very long time we have acted as if problematic churches were an anomaly.  We have, either in honest misunderstanding or as an act of denial, assumed that problematic churches or churches with problem people were a small minority.  We need to educate ourselves about the condition of our churches and the frequency of problematic churches within the Kingdom of God.  This research needs to be both precise, academic research and the personal, antidotal research for our own enlightenment.  A good place to begin is with this website: http://www.intothyword.org/apps/articles/?articleid=36562

I also recommend that you find a copy and watch the documentary film Betrayed: A Clergy Killers DNA.  A review of which can be read here: http://www.virtueonline.org/“betrayed-clergy-killer’s-dna”

The film looks at the subject from a pretty broad base.  I recommend watching this when you are having a good day, otherwise it might be a bit too depressing. 

2.     Prepare ministers (especially new ministers) to confront clergy killers. 

When I was in Bible College we never talked about how to deal with problems in the church with one exception.  I once asked my professor in “Church Administration” how to deal with problem people.  His answer, while well-intentioned, simply doesn’t work with aggressive clergy killers.  He said, “Get out there and grow your church; when you double in size out-vote the bad apples and move on.”  That will work only if everyone is playing by the rules.  By their nature, clergy killers won’t do that.   We need to equip ministers, especially young ministers, to confront clergy killers directly, lovingly, and firmly. 

Here are a few resources that can be helpful in equipping to confront:

·      Necessary Endings, by Henry Cloud, is not specifically about clergy killers, but has fantastic applications that will help a minister protect his mind, family, and soul.  Cloud’s description of three groups of people, “Wise, Foolish, and Evil” and how to deal with each is worth the cost and time for the book.

·      Pastor Abusers by Kent Crockett addresses the fact that conflict resolution will never bring peace between the Kingdoms of Light and Dark.  In other words, face up to the fight.

·      Antagonist in the Church by Kenneth C. Haugk, Ph.D., may be the most practical of these books in terms of establishing systems for dealing with those troubled people who are causing trouble. 

·      Well Intentioned Dragons, Marshall Shelley editor.  This is an older book from the Leadership Library.  It can offer advice on how to minister to problem people.  It only deals with the truly dysfunctional, pathological clergy killer in a couple of chapters. 

This is by no means an exhaustive bibliography on the subject; it is only a starting point.  Beyond printed resources we need to develop the connections with other ministers that will help us keep our sanity.

3.     Get connected

In the struggle of being under attack, a minister is limited in the places he can turn to for support.  He shouldn’t turn too much to family-they are stressed enough already.  He can talk with church members, but that will almost certainly backlash.  He can’t talk to non-Christian friends; they might be turned off from the faith forever.  He has to be careful talking with ministers in the same fellowship; he can get a negative reputation that might follow him.  But the voice of experience is here to tell you there has to be a release valve; if you don’t talk, you feel like you might explode.  Here are three suggestions for great places to talk that can be very helpful.

       i.         Become part of the “Stressed Clergy Association”.  There are no dues or fees.  Simply call them up and someone will help you connect with someone to talk to.  They offer from time to time special events and seminars.  As you might imagine, they are understaffed for the need, but they are a great resource.    http://www.stressedclergyassociation.org

     ii.         Weekly conference call.  I was once part of a weekly conference call with preachers from NC, GA, VA, TX and FL.  We share openly and freely without fear of what we were saying making it back to our home church.  Each week we gave the high point, the low point, and the prayer request.  After everyone talked, we took turns praying for each other.  We also made ourselves available for private calls.  It was an hour each week that was extremely well spent.  Conference calls are easy and cheap.  If you reach out, I will bet you will find other preachers who need this too.

    iii.         PInG.  Talking with preachers from other denominations can be a great help.  For a Pastors In Groups (PInGs) support in your town in which three-at the most four-pastors get together to pray for each other every two weeks.  No agenda, not citywide campaigns, just listening to and caring for each other.  Keep the advice to a minimum.  While you will not agree with these other preachers on every point, you will find most preachers have very compassionate hearts.  One of my best friends today is a PInG mate from 5 years ago.  We keep in close contact. 

You will need to talk.  If you don’t, you might just explode.  If you cannot find anyone else to talk to, please call me.

o   When it gets really bad.

Notice that I said “when” not “if” it gets really bad.  We should expect it to get bad at times.  Most of us would agree that the church in America today, by and large, is not in especially great shape spiritually.  The church is in the world as a witness, but it seems that the world is in the church and one manifestation of spiritual immaturity is that the powers of darkness will use carnal church members to attack the shepherds.  I believe we can prepare ourselves by accepting the reality that Satan is gunning for us and we can expect to get beat up.  Here are a couple of things we all need to do.

       i.         Take care of yourself.  In the midst of the misery of a clergy attack it seems almost wrong to not focus on the church all the time.  That kind of focus is not healthy.  Work hard, but in the same week care for your body, soul, and mind. Eat well, exercise hard, and get your sleep.  Have fun!!! If you fish, take a fishing trip; if you hunt, shoot something.  Ride your motorcycle.  If anyone says anything about it, you tell them, “My councilor (that is me) has ordered me to do this.”  If they give you grief, suggest that they call me. ;)

     ii.         Don’t be afraid to leave the ministry for a season.  I know this sounds heretical.  We have been taught that if a man leaves the ministry he is done for.  Says who?  If you are about to lose it, step down from the ministry for a few years, yes, years.  It will take that long to get over the pain.  DON’T DO THIS IS THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT.  Plan your exit so that you and your family will not be living under a bridge.  It is okay to leave for a little while; God will not love you any less. 

    iii.         Break the golden handcuffs.  Golden Handcuffs typically refers to deferred compensation or benefits that keeps employees on a job they may hate because the loss of the deferred benefits is too great.  For those of us in ministry, we may not have deferred golden handcuffs, but often we feel like we can’t make a living doing anything else.  We are trapped in a bad job at a bad church because we don’t have the training or the experience to get any other job.   Let me offer you my personal experience.  I felt that way.  I was at a church that was killing me.  I left despite the golden (or in my case bronze) handcuffs.  I took about a $25K hit in salary the first year.  It has been a constant financial struggle all along the way.  IT WAS WORTH EVERY DIME.  I actually love God again, my family is better off, and I am free to serve not serving in handcuffs.  I strongly recommend that you make the transition wisely.  Do not let you soul be help hostage to a dollar sign.