The power of free coffee

A Coffee Reception

Last week, we looked at the “Shades of Gray in Follow-Up Contact” with guests who visit our services.  The challenge is to be warm, receptive, and express our interest in our guests while not being creepy or coming across as a stalker.  That balance depends a great deal on our community and context of ministry.  One of the tools that I used that was effective, was a monthly coffee reception. 

Our context was a university city with a population of about 125,000 and total county population of about twice that.  This was a community with plenty of student housing, some gated communities, and schedules that were fairly unpredictable.  This meant that a weekly calling night was almost totally useless.  Calling without appointments was difficult and getting appointments was almost impossible.  Before hosting a coffee reception, I would often connect with less than 5% of the people I attempted to visit.  Calling was a waste of time and a major frustration.  In desperation, I started hosting coffee receptions.

How it worked.

Each Sunday during the announcements, I asked guests for their contact information.  I promised them no one would stalk them, come to visit them, or put their name on a mailing list.  I told them I simply wanted to send a thank you note for their attendance.  Sunday afternoon I wrote each guest a short thank you.  On some occasions it was an email and on others it was a hand written note delivered by the US Post Office.  If their contact information were a phone number, I would call on Monday afternoon.  In this thank you I included an invitation to a monthly coffee reception at a local coffee shop.  I assured them it was my treat and they could come and go at anytime between 5 and 7 pm.  The guest who visited again before the coffee reception I made a point of speaking to and inviting personally.  If I didn’t have a mailing address, I would ask if I could mail them a reminder.  Rarely did anyone say, “No”.  The week before the coffee reception I sent a post card reminding them that I wanted to buy them a cup of coffee and get a chance to visit.  I would arrive 20 minutes early and hang out waiting for our guests.  At these coffee receptions I tried to have other church leaders or members with us.  If I knew that some of the guests were singles, I would ask our singles ministry leader to attend.  If the guest had an existing relationship with a member, I tried to secure the presence of his/her friend for that night.  I always kept the conversations light, general about family, work or sports, with the intention of building friendship and connections.  I did not do evangelism, but instead, tried to earn the right to speak into their lives by caring about them.

Why it worked

The coffee reception was the place where we could begin to transition people from being guests to becoming acquaintances and moving toward friendship.  The coffee reception was a place where guests felt safe and where they controlled the schedule.  They could leave anytime they wanted, rather than hoping an unwanted caller at their home would leave.  It was also a chance to see that the minister was not some untouchable, distant figure that lived in a world of theology and vague spirituality.  I make a point of cutting up and joking with members present.  I was the fan of a rival football team and engaged in good-natured teasing about sports.  I paid, and never asked for reimbursement and refused if any were offered.  Many un-churched people have never had the church or any agent of the church give to them.   We have all heard the cliché, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”  While a cup of coffee and a visit doesn’t prove a great heart, it is at least a beginning and it set the tone for the on going relationship. 

Principles and Methods

These monthly receptions were well attended and over a five-year period we never failed to have a guest show up.  While I did not keep specific track of first contact with the decisions made, I would guess that over 80% of the people who either placed their membership with us or became Christ-followers, began their relationship with our congregation at a coffee reception.  Elmer Towns says, “Methods are many; Principles are few.  Methods may change, but principles never do.”  A coffee reception is a method that may or may not work for you, but behind it is the principle of loving people, of developing friendships and of showing them you care.